Mother’s Day 2020: 8 Things We’ve Learned About Our Moms In This Year Unlike Any Other


Atiqah Mokhtar •  May 09, 2020

For many of us, Mother's Day this year is one that is marked by truly unprecedented circumstance. In these last couple of months, we have collectively faced some changes and experiences unlike any other. As we've adjusted to this new normal (which is continuously shifting!), it's also been a great reminder of some of the blessings we take for granted, such as our health, our freedom to move around, and of course, our families.

Credit: Giphy

In this uncertain period, our mothers have been stepping up as only moms can - running the household, juggling professional duties and also their role as caregivers, and being a source of comfort for their children (i.e. us!). For this Mother's Day, we reached out to our readers and also our team here at HHWT to ask this question: In this current COVID-19 period, what have you come to learn about your mom? And here are some of the responses, in tribute to these incredible women in our lives ❤️

1. That being able to spend this time at home with our moms is a blessing

"I always used travelling as an excuse to spend more quality time with my mother, due to my busy schedule. Now that I'm working from home, I'm beginning to value our small but meaningful interactions like chatting in the living room or sending her a photo of my lunch while she's out grocery shopping. These lighthearted moments might turn into a distant memory once everything goes back to normal, but it made me realised how grateful I am that she's here at home, safe and healthy, with me. With everything that's happening right now, it's a blessing to celebrate this special day with my mother and her presence has been something that I appreciate more these days." - Cheng Sim

"I have been living away from my parents for years for work. So I only occasionally visited my mom once a week. This work from home situation truly helps me to spend time with her at home. We cook, bake, and do chores together and even share more about what I've been missing while I was away. Of course, we sometimes don't always get along as we're together 24/7 now ? But after things go back to normal, I realise there will come that time in future when I leave the house again, so I am truly grateful that I get the chance to be with her at home for now. I realize that being a mother is a lifetime task - it's literally neverending and demands a lot both mentally and physically. But she nails it and no one can do better being my mom than my mom!" - Tiara

2. Our moms are basically superwomen, juggling responsibilities and daily life in these trying times

"My mum, Sharifah Raja, is extremely patient and selfless. I never really noticed how much she does before this because I’m barely home but thanks to the circuit breaker, I now realise HOW MUCH she actually does. She’s an essential worker so she goes out to work as usual, from 7am to 7pm. On top of that, she takes care of my grandfather and still gets everything done. By everything I mean: clean, do the laundry, solat terawih, have her online mengaji classes, catch up on her Hindustan movies (hahahaha) and makes sure that everyone is well-fed. And the best part? I don’t have a dad. So I really can’t even imagine how she’s been doing this routine for more than 20 years without a single whine. Amazing. ?" - Nurul (you can find also find her on her blog!)

2. For those of us who are living away from our moms, we've had to get used to seeing them through a screen...

"I usually see my mum at least once a week before the Circuit Breaker when she comes over to my house for dinner and even more often during Ramadan. She usually gives me a big hug before we part ways each time, so I’ve come to really appreciate those weekly sessions where we’ll catch up during this period. Thank goodness for technology because I’ll try to FaceTime her more often during the week, though ⅓ of the time my camera view is my cat so that she can see what he’s doing ? So for everyone who has your mum with you, please give her a nice warm hug ❤️ Happy Mother’s Day to all the amazing mums out there!" - Suzana

2. ...but often, even regular screen time can't quite make up for face-to-face interactions

"During these last few months, I've come to realise how much I value being able to see my mom in person. My mom lives in KL while I stay in Singapore, and I usually visit my family at least once a month. Since I haven’t been able to visit her these last few months, I feel like there is a particular void that doesn’t get filled, even though I video-call her every week. It’s made me realise that being in my mom’s physical presence is something I have to cherish and not take for granted. Once regular travel between Malaysia and Singapore is permitted again, I'm totally going to visit her and the rest of my family for a loooong trip ? "- Atiqah

3. Even though we're independent adults, we still turn to our mom for care and support

"After spending the last few years studying abroad, I'm incredibly grateful to be under the same roof as my mom at this moment. As much as I enjoyed being independent, nothing comes close as to having her care for me in every way possible - and looking back on it now, she's truly the driving force behind why I was able to handle so many things on my own. I've learned a lot of invaluable lessons from my mom (this includes all her delicious recipes ?) and to be by her side during this trying time, I am beyond blessed. " - Ili  

4. That they're often not just masterchefs but also the heart of the home

"What I really appreciate during this period is the fact that my mom cooks almost every day (even more so in Ramadan!) and that’s something I’m super thankful for! I am also in awe of the fact that she can think of so many different things to cook on a daily basis. Being at home has also given me the opportunity to see my mom’s regular routine. That’s when I truly realise how much it takes to run a household and that I should do more to help out whenever I can. I also realise that it doesn’t to be big gestures but simple things like cleaning up and washing the dishes are already enough to lighten her load. It is also heartening to see how much she enjoys having us at home. I’m also happy that at home, I can be there for her when she needs someone to talk to or when she needs an opinion so the mental burden of making household decisions isn’t fully on her ? It’s these little things that make me blessed to be at home during this period." - Faruq

5. Some of our moms are front liners and essential service workers who are tirelessly serving the community

"My beloved mum is a healthcare worker nurse of more than 35 years, and right now she's in charge of a COVID-19 ward in the hospital. She looks extra tired whenever she comes back home from work, but she never fails to make time for me and my brother, in fact, our bonding time hasn't changed throughout this period. She still cooks for us, even trying out new recipes or even cooking a specific dish at my younger brother's request. I had a slight case of food poisoning recently yet she still went out of her way to cook 2 dishes - porridge for me and another dish for my brother and aunt (who lives with us). Other than cooking, she still spends time with us, like watching movies on Netflix together, browsing through online shopping websites together, or going out to buy groceries together. On some shifts, she barely gets enough sleep, what more during this Ramadhan month where she needs to wake up early for sahur.

Another sacrifice she has had to make is the fact that she can't see her husband (my stepdad) as he is in currently in Malaysia while we're here in Singapore. He was settling some renovation works for our house in Malaysia when the lockdown happened and he couldn't come home. She's dealing with so many emotions, but I can see that she is always trying her best to cope with these challenges just so that we, her children, have that sense of calmness and reassurance from her." - Nurin

"On a regular day, my mother does not get to spend time with all 5 of her children being a healthcare worker. Now that we are experiencing a pandemic, that has meant she has even less time spent with us. She often receives work calls and messages on the weekends, leaving her with little time to rest and spend time with her family. However, she still considers herself to be lucky, as many people don't even have the luxury of spending any time with their families during this trying period. My mother goes to work by taxi most of the time, and I have to thank the drivers too for being considerate and respectful despite knowing that my mother works at a hospital. After a long day of work, she usually eats dinner, ask us about our day and rests. However, as Ramadan came along, she eats dinner followed by prayers together with the family, which has helped us spend a little more time together too.

I am sure many more families are facing these situations too. Many don't get to spend time with their families at all, hence I am thankful for even the small interactions with my mother and other family members. From the bottom of my heart, I would like to thank not only my mum but all the front-liners and essential service workers for their hard work and effort! Happy Mother's Day to all mothers out there!" - Afiqah

7. For some of us, this period has also been a reminder of how are moms are getting older and that it's our turn to take care of them

"My mom is 77 years old. She has been staying with me since last year. My dad has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Dementia for a few years now and last year, when my dad’s condition became too much for her to handle all by herself, they came to live with me. It was a difficult decision to make as my mom still wants to live in the comfort of her home. But having my dad rely solely on her 24/7 just took a toll on her. Having her stay with me allows me to assist her in taking care of my dad. She can perform her solat, take her bath, or just have a short nap without interruption while I take care of my dad. That is the least I could do. She has more time for herself now since all the household chores are taken care of. Though I try to make her feel at home as much as possible, she still thinks of going home and hopes that everything will go back to the way it was before. I suppose, I just need to listen to her frustrations, absorb her sadness (I really wish I could absorb it all!), and give her the emotional support that she needs.

I am glad that she is with me now… no more sleepless nights wondering if she is doing fine or if she is eating and sleeping well. I remember always crying myself to sleep just thinking about my Mom and Dad back in their hometown, all by themselves doing all the daily chores. I am indeed blessed, to be given this chance, in this lifetime, to get to do what I am doing now." - Rynn

8. Their love for us incomparable

"All the money that I earn will never be enough to repay all the sacrifice that she made. Her patience towards everything that surrounds her including her grandchildren is just too incredible that describing with words do not do justice to what she had done. During this challenging period, she ensures the safety of her grandchildren is of paramount. Despite her age (turning 66 this year), she is actively involved in ensuring everything is topnotch at home." - Noora

There's no doubt about it - being a mom is an incredibly hard task that requires sacrifices, especially more so in extraordinary times like these. Many moms pour so much into caring for their children, even though it sometimes gets taken for granted. Mother's Day is a good reminder to acknowledge and show appreciation to our moms, but beyond today, may we all continuously show this appreciation and cherish our moms and the impact they have on our lives ❤️ Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful mothers and thank you for all that you do!